The low-budget creature feature is a beloved subgenre that has only gained momentum over the decades. It arguably reached its cultural peak with Sharknado, when the Syfy channel rebranded itself to focus almost exclusively on such offerings, but in the years since, cult followings have emerged. There is a real demand for these sorts of easily digestible monster movies: low-budget, tongue-in-cheek creature features that don’t aim to be taken seriously as pieces of cinema, but rather to appeal to those who love cheap, schlocky, unashamedly bad movies. You know, people like me.
They don’t always turn out so well. For every Sharknado, there are ten barely-watchable, microbudget shark movies, and even trash connoisseurs have their standards. But there is a pretty reliable stream of regular movies that offer cheap, cheesy fun and tick all the boxes that make for an entertaining watch. The latest example of such a movie is Bears on a Ship. As this one’s title suggests, it is humorously riffing on the already-ludicrous Samuel L. Jackson action-horror Snakes on a Plane, and thankfully, it knows exactly what kind of movie it is, embraces it, and delivers an extremely fun time.
‘Bears on a Ship’ Makes the Most of Its Fun Setup

The basic premise of Bears on a Ship is in the title, but let’s expand a little: the movie opens with two hunters trying to track down and contain a particular kind of bear. One of the hunters gets gobbled up, but the other appears to capture two of these bears and load them onto a small cruise ship due to set sail from Mexico back to the U.S. Also on board is a ragtag bunch of folks from all walks of life: a businessman and his wife needing to get back from their honeymoon, a stoner and his girlfriend, a nurse and her husband, and a hippie who can’t sing. This is like no cruise ship you’ve seen. It’s old, beaten up, and seems pretty much devoid of life except for a string of strip lights in the ballroom. Nobody is too thrilled to be here, but they’re willing to go with it in order to get from A to B.

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What the gang doesn’t know is that there are motherf*cking bears on this motherf*cking ship (yes, that is a line spoken in the film). So, in classic monster movie fashion, all hell breaks loose as the two bears amble their way around the vessel with surprising dexterity, getting their big furry claws on anyone they come across. They navigate flights of stairs on their hind legs and hide in impossible places, while the passengers try to band together and fight back while waiting to be rescued. It’s a setup you’ve seen a hundred times before, so what makes Bears on a Ship such a fun watch?
Although it’s not working with any remarkable budget, equipment, or big names, from its first frame, you can tell it’s of a much higher quality than most movies in this subgenre. The picture largely looks good and crisp, and they had enough in the coffers to afford drone shots, underwater shots, and some decent enough sets. Most strikingly, we even get a few action shots of the bears, from snout to tail, in their full glory, albeit in very dim lighting. When a bear is shot overboard, we actually see it fall. These might seem like small things, but they make the difference between crappy movies and crappy entertaining movies.
A Lot of Heart, Soul and Fun Went into ‘Bears on a Ship’

But best of all is the cast. We’re working with a good number of people here, over a dozen, which in other movies can be too much for an audience to keep track of. Hell, the many teenagers lining up as shark bait in Jaws 2 proved that there is such a thing as too large an ensemble. But the way each of these characters is played and worked into the story allows them to distinguish themselves, even if they’re not vital to the action. They go off on their own little side missions in clusters of two or three — groups of friends, husbands and wives, etc. — and it stops the place from feeling too overcrowded, while allowing plenty of potential chum for the bears.
Most importantly, this ensemble cast gets it. They know that they are in a low-budget, indie monster movie, and so while they don’t have to be Robert De Niro, they understand that they need to lean into the comedy and ham it up. Writer/director Eduardo Castrillo turned out a really fun script that got a lot of genuine laughs out of me, and he makes sure that his project stays on exactly the right track: cheap and tacky, but always doing its best to entertain. He directs his cast with this aim at the forefront, encouraging them to go bigger, stupider, and more outrageous. Jonez Cain’s character goes from cheeky, good-hearted nurse to a badass packin’ heat with impressive fluidity, while Sherill Quinn is fun as the hippie who thinks appealing to the bears’ spiritual side might be the answer. With everybody understanding the assignment, Bears on a Ship is truly one of those movies you can relax and have fun with.
The movie ends with a title card that reads: “This movie was made through crowdfunding and support of the community. Together we make dreams happen.” This is followed by a dedication to the memories of two friends, a sentiment that really sums up exactly what makes this movie work — heart. Bears on a Ship is stuffed full of fun and passion, and you can truly feel it. The folks behind this project wanted to make a movie, and as is often the case with low-budget or amateur efforts, they put everything they had into it, as indie productions have to work that much harder to get noticed. Well, Bears on a Ship, I noticed you, and I loved you. Perhaps Castrillo and crew could keep the ball rolling and throw some sequels our way. 2 Bears 1 Ship? Bears 2: The Shippening? Call me, guys. I’d love to be a producer!

Bears on a Ship

Writer/director Eduardo Castrillo delivers the ultimate summer monster B-movie.

Director

Eduardo Castrillo

Writers

Eduardo Castrillo

Pros & Cons

A funny script and direction that understands the monster movie genre
Solid performances from a likeminded cast
Decent production values and camerawork