8 Things We Learned From The Last Golden Globes (Maybe)
Mar 17, 2023
These likely will not be the last Golden Globes. The Hollywood Foreign Press Association will continue, but many have speculated this will be the last Globes telecast on NBC. Unless the ratings truly surprise, which we doubt they will, the network will use the recent controversy and lackluster viewership to get out of their contract. As an awards telecast, however, the 80th edition showed why the Globes have lasted so long in the first place and why the Critics Choice Awards have tried to copy their formula (badly) for 28 years.
READ MORE: “The Banshees of Inisherin,” “The Fablemans” and “The White Lotus” top 2023 Golden Globes Awards [Complete List]
The Globes have never been more than an excuse for Hollywood to have a post-New Years party and a mechanism for studios and networks to campaign for more prestigious honors. The move to Tuesday night effectively killed the opportunity to party more than the virtual pandemic ceremonies ever did (the era of that tough HBO guest list and the chocolate bar at the Warner Bros./In Style party is clearly long gone). But we’ll admit the show surprised us. It was more compelling than it should have been and the 103 new voters lead to a number of genuine surprises (most notably with the Non-English Language Film winner “Argentina, 1985”).
Keeping all that in mind, some thoughts…
Jerrod Carmichael lays it all out
Get that $500,000 Jerrod! As one would expect, Carmichael did not provide the traditional “star-roasting” opening monologue we see at most awards shows and, traditionally at the Globes. Instead, he wondered aloud why he took this gig. He admitted the money was a big part of it (we’ll assume that was not a bit) and bluntly remarked how he had no intention of meeting HFPA president Helen Hoehne beforehand. He swore (was bleeped out a ton), apologized to Jennifer Coolidge on behalf of the gays (a “White Lotus” moment), and then utterly dropped the mic when he proposed exchanging the three Golden Globes Tom Cruise famously returned for the safe return of Shelly Miscavige. He’s likely never hosting the Globes again, but an Independent Spirit Awards gig might be in his future.
There were some…Stars!
James Cameron, Steven Spielberg, and Selena Gomez were there. Michelle Yeah and Michelle Williams were there. Even Margot Robbie and Brad Pitt made it. Rihanna had a front-row seat and TikTok superstar Jenny Ortega had a shot at winning (she didn’t). But there were also a ton of no-shows. Cate Blanchett, Olivia Colman, Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, Zendaya, and Kevin Costner could not attend for various reasons. In previous years, they would have found a way (besides Costner, who was legitimately sheltering in place).
The Globes are a public relations opportunity
The only thing a show like the Golden Globes can do is be a public relations tool for guild members and, potentially, Academy members (although that’s very debatable). Although it’s unclear if that will mean anything in 2023. That being said, the PR winners of the night were Angela Bassett in the Supporting Actress race, “Naatu, Naatu” from “RRR” for a Best Original Song nomination. Steven Spielberg for Best Director, and “The Banshees of Inisherin” and “The Fablemans” for Best Picture. On the television side, “The White Lotus” dominated just in time for SAG and PGA season, and “House of the Dragon” pulled off what “Game of Thrones” never did, a Best Television Series – Drama win.
We need Jennifer Coolidge at the Oscars
Maybe she’ll show us her crocs if she’s invited to the Dolby Theater. Coolidge not only was hilarious presenting an award but her speech after her Globes win was one of the best of the night. She made “White Lotus” creator Mike White cry noting, “You’ve changed my life in a million different ways. My neighbors are speaking to me.”
Michelle Yeoh has her moment
She said she wanted to soak this in. After years of being insulted, discriminated and overlooked by Hollywood, the “Everything Everywhere All At Once” star had a Golden Globe in her hands. And when the music tried to play her off the Best Actress in a Musical or Comedy deadpanned, “Shut up, please! I can beat you up, okay? And that’s serious.” And everyone in the room knew she could!
Someone tell Austin Butler to stop doing the Elvis voice
Austin, you were raised in Southern California! This is not what you sounded like before you made this movie. It’s not gonna help you in a tight race with Colin Farrell for Best Actor!
Ryan Murphy gives it back
We’ve often criticized Murphy for his creative choices and he has a habit of allowing many of his shows to completely drop off a cliff over subsequent seasons, but his acceptance speech for the Carol Burnett Award for Achievement in television was simply remarkable. Humbly, Murphy spent almost all of his time pointing out the achievements of the LGBTQ+ actors he’s worked with who were in the room such as M.J. Rodriguez (the first trans woman to win a Golden Globe last year in a ceremony that wasn’t aired), Matt Bomer (who braved coming out of the closet when he was a young man and still became a star), Niecy Nash (who was told she shouldn’t marry the love her life, a woman, and just had the biggest year of her career), Jeremy Pope (a nominee that night who refused to stay in the closet) and Billy Porter (who presented Murphy with the award but couldn’t wear his Oscar dress because it’s in a museum and had a Fuscia duplicate made just for the evening). He called these colleagues his “heroes” and shined his spotlight on them. And even if he had a part in helping their careers, he gave them the credit, not himself. And, last but not least, he gave a shout-out to anyone queer living in the state of Florida and the battle they are having to wage against an increasingly oppressive political environment. Props to you Mr. Murphy.
We forgot what alcohol does at awards shows
The reason the Globes telecast was often enjoyable to viewers over the past two decades was twofold. First, it was just about the awards. Rarely a musical number (unless Jimmy Fallon did so partially in lieu of a monologue). Rarely an overabundance (or any) film montages. The show moves quickly and has a ton of trophies to give out. Second, the attendees are served alcohol and, um, not much of a meal. Science can pretty much dictate what happens next. This has often resulted in not only memorable and hilarious acceptance speeches, but very buzzed talent attempting to present said awards. The room is light and more intimate than other awards shows. And you could sense a tiny bit of that magic (very tiny) as the show progressed. But is it all too late? For NBC, it appears so.
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