Summary

“You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah” is a family-friendly watch that celebrates growing up from a Jewish perspective. The screenplay strikes a balance between relatable gen-Z language and appealing to audiences of all ages and backgrounds. While the film follows a predictable trajectory, the journey and performances make it well worth the watch for anyone seeking an entertaining and culturally significant dramedy.

Editor’s note: This piece was written during the 2023 WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes. Without the labor of the writers and actors currently on strike, the movie being covered here wouldn’t exist.

Based on Fiona Rosenbloom’s 2005 young adult novel of the same name, You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah is a great watch for the whole family. Alison Peck’s screenplay is a family affair, both in front of and behind the scenes. Starring Adam Sandler, Sunny Sandler, Samantha Lorraine, Idina Menzel, Jackie Sandler, and Sadie Sandler, this coming-of-age dramedy is a win for Netflix and audiences alike. Director Sammi Cohen comes out swinging with her second feature-length film, showcasing the exciting yet challenging side of growing up from a Jewish perspective. Though we’ve seen the “breakup then makeup” storytelling in this genre before, Cohen’s film is an easy watch with a satisfying enough ending.

Cohen and Peck’s adaptation follows childhood best friends Stacy Friedman (Sunny Sandler) and Lydia Rodriguez Katz (Samantha Lorraine) as they prepare to enter adulthood. The girls plan to put on the best Bat Mitzvahs their friends have ever seen, but there’s just one problem standing in the way — his name is Andy Goldfarb (Dylan Hoffman). Stacy and Lydia are both after Andy’s affections, but when one of the girls starts to date him, the new relationship threatens their longtime friendship. The drama that ensues demonstrates the viciousness of middle school and growing up. But the real story lies in how these two young ladies find their way back to each other.

As with many coming-of-age stories, You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah appropriately blends drama and comedy in a way that feels relatable and timely. Screenwriter Alison Peck does an exceptional job of including language familiar to gen-Z while maintaining a sensible balance to reach audiences of all ages and backgrounds. Through Stacy and Lydia’s friendship, the script celebrates growing up within the Jewish religion in a way that is beautiful and non-stereotypical. It’s also nice to see young characters celebrate who they are and how they grew up instead of rejecting and/or making fun of it, which is often an overly used trope within this genre.

As the story progresses, and we come to the main conflict within Lydia and Stacy’s stories, Cohen’s feature follows the typical trajectory one would expect. However, the predictability never takes away from the watching experience. Rather, the journey to the end is the strength of the film. You Are So Not Invited does tend to lean into the extreme sometimes, which says a great deal either about cattiness among teenagers or my withdrawal from that world. Either way, the actions of some of the characters go beyond belief, which garners some eyebrow raises with respect to how quickly Stacy and Lydia renew their friendship. By execution standards, this could have been improved.

Ultimately though, this family affair is not only great for audiences of all types, but it’s good to see longtime entertainer Adam Sandler have some fun on screen with his own family. Director Sammi Cohen recognizes the chemistry of her cast and lets them operate within their natural dynamic, which in turn leads to great performances and situations anyone can see themselves within. The film’s two stars (Sunny as Stacy and Samantha as Lydia) are exceptional and should immediately be added to any “rising stars” or “young actors to look out for” lists. With these two at the center, everything seems to fall into place, manifesting a final product that is well worth the watch.

If you’re looking for a young adult dramedy that is equal parts entertaining and culturally eventful, seek no further than Netflix’s latest. You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah celebrates the Jewish religion and showcases to those who may not fully understand how beautiful it can be. While Cohen’s latest doesn’t break any genre barriers, this coming-of-age story dissects and visualizes female friendships with grounded realism, welcoming us into its world while leaving room for us to picture ourselves in it. Adam Sandler has graced our presence with another hit on his hands, and now his family is here to do the same. We’ll be here to welcome them with open arms with great projects like this one.

You Are So Not Invited to My Bat Mitzvah is now streaming on Netflix. The film is 101 minutes long and rated PG-13 for brief teen drinking, strong language, and some crude & suggestive material.