Watching A Real Pain, I was reminded of Alexander Payne’s Sideways. Thematically, the two might not share much in common. While characters in both films can be seen drinking wine, A Real Pain doesn’t relish in Pinot noir. It won’t hurt Merlot sales either. The leads may fall under the middle-aged umbrella, but Sideways’ protagonists have more than a few years on A Real Pain’s duo. As far as buddy pictures go, though, Jesse Eisenberg and Kieran Culkin share the type of chemistry we haven’t seen since Paul Giamatti and Thomas Haden Church twenty years ago.
Eisenberg is the neurotic introvert while Culkin shines as the outgoing f***up. Taking on directorial and writing duties as well, Eisenberg gives his most complete performance since The Social Network as David Kaplan. David is content being a painfully ordinary husband, father, and digital ad salesman. Culkin’s Benji is the opposite, not being tied down by any responsibility. He’s the kind of guy who can make friends anywhere yet has nobody to come home to, perfectly offsetting Eisenberg’s meek family man.
Following the death of their grandmother, the two cousins set off on a pilgrimage to Poland in hopes of getting in touch with their Jewish roots. Benji forms an immediate connection with the others on their tour. Even when Benji brings up uncomfortable subjects concerning privilege, grief, and introducing tourism to the Holocaust, the others can’t help but admire his unfiltered honesty. David, meanwhile, keeps to himself, although both cousins are concealing deep pain. In addition to the death of their grandmother and the scars of history, there’s an elephant in the room that David and Benji are afraid to address. In Eisenberg’s best scene, he unleashes his buried emotions while still coming off as restrained.
Culkin has been acting almost his entire life, although he’s often lived in the shadow of big brother Macaulay. He’s shaken his underrated status in recent years with an Emmy-winning turn in Succession. An Oscar nomination may follow with a performance that effortlessly traverses comedy and sadness. Culkin creates a character who’s impossible to dislike, even at his most aggressive. This makes it all the more devastating as we see how alone Benji is behind the social surface. In addition to Sideways, A Real Pain calls Planes, Trains and Automobiles to mind. Instead of a warm Thanksgiving dinner, though, A Real Pain is more like sitting down to Seudat Havra’ah.
The film’s titular pain isn’t limited to one source. The enduring pain of the Holocaust adds to the loss of Grandma. Benji can also be a pain in David’s ass. The heartbreak is balanced with humor, although rewatching the film, some of the funnier scenes might read more tragically. Like the characters, there are multiple layers to the film that require a closer look. Yet, it only takes one viewing to know that this is a hilarious, tear-jerking, and personal film about, among other things, identity. Where one character walks away with reassurance of who he is, the other is left to question where he belongs.